Written By: Vivek Sharma

How many times have you felt cold feet when you were made to speak publicly? Trust me public speaking isn’t everybody’s cup of tea. It requires a lot of courage, confidence, focus, and conviction. One of the recently concluded studies revealed that the general population's No. 1 fear is public speaking, nearly followed by the other No. 1 fear: Death. This proves people usually prefer to find the answer to the ultimate question rather than speak in front of strangers.

If you also struggle with social settings, feel gauche speaking publicly or hesitant in meeting new people, there’s nothing wrong with you. It’s just that you need to polish a few things and people will notice you. There is no doubt that there are some people who are socially skilled, born with a silver tongue, and can dazzle a captive audience.

There are plenty of books, online business magazines, and other resources that can help you achieve this goal and make you feel a social butterfly. So you wish to know how you can improve your social skills without saying a word in a social gathering:

Easily Approachable

There are some people who are reluctant in making themselves easily approachable. This is not good in any way, but you can make yourself approachable by your body language and facial expression. Your body language decides people want to approach you or not. We all know that our body language speaks volumes about us. At your next social gathering take a second to think what you’re body language is saying to others. If you’re standing against a wall, it means, don’t notice me, I wish I weren’t here. If your arms are folded against your chest, it says, stay away from me, as I’m not going to tell you a thing about myself and don’t want anyone new entering my life.

Try to stand openly even if you aren’t comfortable, because you don’t like to appear that way. It has been proved that a relaxed, open stance invites other people to enter your space. Same goes with the facial expressions as well. Experts feel that our face is the gateway to how we feel, that’s why; a strong poker face can make the difference between winning the pot and losing it all.

This doesn’t mean you keep on bluffing in a social setting to win people’s interest but ornament your face with a smile. According to the experts a friendly smile is an understanding nod, a hearty laugh, and making eye contact are integral. All these facial expressions tell others that you are a good audience and someone who is enjoyable to talk to.

Business week magazines always propagate that if you keep on rolling your eyes and furrowing your brow in social situations, try to contemplate about what you’re saying to others and why you may struggle in achieving social success. To cut the long story, a sheer introspection.

Don’t feel that you can’t develop public speaking skills as they are in your hands; all you need is correct guidance, few tips, and reading the second part.

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• Posted: 01 Oct 2008
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